Amazingly,

The minute I said it that had been pent up, the very second I hit send, it felt like all of the weight of the world lifted off my shoulders. I wasn't angry, or sad, or bitter. I was just done, and with great relief.

I had a very difficult choice to make.. I could either say exactly what you wanted to hear or I could say what was actually on my mind. I decided that it was about time I start speaking my point of view. I always sit by, idly watching people come in and out of my life. Getting attached while they're in and longing for them while they're out. I never speak my mind, stick up for myself. I just let it happen. I couldn't anymore. It had all built up. And while I feel bad that a once great friendship was lost, I owed it to myself to at least speak up.

I've said everything I've ever needed to.

And now, while I wish things could have ended on less..bitter terms. I'm finally not angry or sad. I'm just done. And I with this chapter closing, I can move on. I won't cringe when I see your name (which is pretty much everywhere), I won't avoid King of the Hill, or Taco Time, or Club 48 because they remind me of you. I've avoided turning on the computer in my room for two months because your face is on the background. Now I can't wait to turn it on and change it. I won't avoid my ipod just because there's a chance your band might come on shuffle. I don't have this sick to my stomach gutwrenching feeling when I think of you. I spent almost two months with that feeling of uncertainty in my stomach. And I'm so glad all of that is done. Letting someone in is hard, letting them go is harder.

I'm just so ready to move on.